Lady Gaga and Shopping.

Today, I did two very exciting things: a) drove on the freeway, and b) went shopping!

I know that driving on the freeway isn't actually exciting, at least not for normal people, but I've been terrified of the freeway for a long time and I've realized it's hindered my abilities to be a normal part of society as an independant young woman. So I am slowly getting into it and soon I will be unstoppable!

And, shopping. Oh how I love shopping. I've become a smarter shopper than I used to be (shopping things I KNOW I will wear, and only things I absolutely love) but I still sometimes snap and spend way too much. Like today. Even though I love (LOVE) all my purchases, I can't help but feel just a little buyer's remorse. I haven't bought any of my clothes I need for recruitment yet, and that's going to cost a lot...plus, my employment at home is coming to a hiatus pretty soon so unless I get a job in Seattle pretty soon, I won't have a steady source of income anymore.

So I PROMISE--no more purchases until I shop for absolutely necessary things!

Also, on Lady Gaga.

I was musing today, and I think that Lady Gaga's career is going to go one of these two ways:

1) She's going to marry that boyfriend of hers and be like "I am retiring. I am a classic housewife. I always have been. My heart has been empty in showbiz," and go out with a bang and then be a stay-at-home mom for the rest of her life.

Or, 2) She's going to freak out and be all "I can't do it anymore. Hollywood has taken it's soul-numbing toll on my body and mind. I am the Fame Monster. WHOOSH!" And like disappear and live off the grid for the rest of her life.

Kick-Off to a New Year

I don't even know where to begin! We had a family reunion this weekend in Eastern WA with my wildly colorful extended family, and I was threatening to blog about it all week, but now I have total blogger's block!

It was really, really fun. I saw some cousins I haven't seen in a while. With incidents like my cousin Ryan telling me about the aliens coming for me, sometimes I almost felt like I was nine again, except with more people sneaking me alcohol! There were adorable little kids to play with and great music (until I accidentally deleted my cousin-in-law's artfully planned playlist!!) and great company!

My sister Hailey and I went to my aunt's house early with my cousin Randi to spend some time with my aunt, uncle, cousin, and her little girls before all the rest of the fam came. It was so great to be in the sun with some of my favorite family members; I really had a wonderful time!

Some of my favorite memories include but are not limited to: Joking around with my cousin Randi (CLASSIC lemonade!), making fun of my cousin Bobby's Canadian accent ("A hooooge auwl!!"), dancing with my little cousins, and watching True Blood with my aunt Roberta.

It was a great bow to wrap up my summer. Move-in is starting to creep up on me, and there's a lot to do and shop for (yay!) before then. Of course I'm starting to freak out about that a little, but more on that later (I bet you can't wait!) and I have a lot to look forward to in September!
Week One: Moving In.
Week Two: Work Week (getting ready for rush).
Week Three: Rush.
Week Four: Dawg Daze Volunteering (kick-off for the freshmen).
Week Five: Recital Choir Callbacks and First Day of Sophomore Year!

Whew. Luckily I like being busy, so I can't wait.

Also, looking at the photos from this weekend has shown me that I SUPER need to lose weight. I look like a troll in most of them. Can I do it by September??

Cheers,
Malia

Pedestrian Peeves.

Even though I am one most of the time, I really really dislike pedestrians while I'm driving. Especially the ones who cross in front of you in parking lots. Especially when you don't even get an acknowledging thank-you wave! Or when they run with those little steps that doesn't make them go any faster but makes them look stupid.

No seriously. They drive me crazy.

Cherry Bomb!

As far back as I can remember, I've always been a swirl of emotion and thoughts, impulsive and bouncing off the walls. Whenever I have to make a decision, I need to make a concious effort to not do what first pops into my mind, but to clear my head, think about it, figure out what my best option is.

I really admire people who can be calm and content. I've known people who seem to be my complete opposite, and I'm so grateful for them because sometimes it's good to realize: wait, I don't have to freak out about this, do I? Will this even matter in ten years? Ten minutes??

The other day I was feeling really calm, even content. Immediately I started growing uneasy. It's almost like I was thinking "oh GREAT. What's going to come along and ruin this peace I've somehow stumbled into? Something HAS to ruin it, right??" But I've struggled with that type of thinking for forever. I've been noticing this pattern I have, where every time I really feel happy and like I have everything ahead of me, I start trying to sabatoge myself with some new (or old) worry, thought, anything that disrupts feeling happy and peaceful. And I don't know why I do that to myself, but I'm trying to notice it and stop it now that I'm more aware of it.

In the meantime, taking time out of my day to focus on breathing and meditate on being peaceful has been really helpful. It still takes a lot of effort, but I've noticed that when I'm going through my day and I start getting all crazy about something, I have this place of peace inside me where I can go and just calm down for a second! I'm learning that I just need to let myself be calm instead whizzing from one emotion to another.

Blog at y'all later!

Meditation Hesitation

My mind has been sort of a jumble-y mess lately, which means I've been kind of anxious and just not very centered. So my wise radio DJ cousin suggested I try meditating, and that if I stick with it, I'll get some answers on how to be more peaceful.

So I've been reading up on meditation, and after some yoga, I decided to try it out today. I sat in a comfortable position, came up with a little mantra, and began breathing deeply, clearing my mind, counting to ten...aaahh.

But I couldn't do it. I couldn't sit there long enough to get past three sets of deep breaths before I started checking my phone, looking around, just getting uncomfortable. I tried twice, but I just couldn't get my mind to quiet down.

But...at least I tried? And I'm going to try again tomorrow, and the next day, etc. because I think it's important to find stillness in each day, especially when my mind has been so...unclear.

Maybe next time you hear from me I'll be a meditation expert!

KStew: Love her or Hate her...

...she's here to stay! The actress has been cause of controversy lately, especially since Twilight, the launch pad that catapulted her (slightly unwillingly, it would seem) into fame and fortune.

Though she's been around for longer (Into the Wild, In The Land of Women, even in Panic Room, Speak, and that one movie about kid-bank-robbers as a child/adolescent), it seems like critics and the general public really started paying attention to her career after Twilight. Maybe it's the fact that she handled playing such a hokey character with grace, or just the fact that she was the actress chosen to play the iconic role of Bella. Probably a mixture of both. Either way, suddenly everyone is singing her praises...or are they?

In my opinion (but what do I know?) Kristen does a great job of creating relatable characters through a mix of raw vulnerability and real-person-awkwardness, blending in little idiosyncrasies we the viewers can recognize in ourselves. Kristen has recieved widespread praise for her acting abilities, and critics generally agree that the young actress has a long and bright future ahead of her.

However. The problem that I can't help noticing is that all her roles are very distinctly Kristen. While there's nothing really wrong with that (look at Drew Barrymore for heavens' sake) it's just that her characters start to feel a bit recycled, as I notice character after character doing the same weird Bella stutter and awkward-unsure-of-herself stance. I almost start to wonder if she's just being herself in every character.

But then you read an interview (one very interesting one I read in last month's Elle) and it's more than obvious that Kristen cares deeply about her work. In the interview I read, she was enraged at the allegations that she "doesn't care" about the craft, an impression she's given people due to her alarmingly acute fear and dislike of red carpet events and other "extras" that come with being a celebrity.

She seems to be a very self-deprecating and dark individual, and I wonder where her extreme awkwardness at the events described above comes from. It's clear to anyone she's uncomfortable--remember that weird Bella stutter? It's all over Kristen's publicity events as well as her movies, and so is the awkward stance. She seems so unwilling to be put in the spotlight, and it seems like paparazzi go after her all the more because of this (exhibit A: Her intensely private relationship with RPatz. No one can leave it alone, and it's probably only because the pair refuse to open up about it with anyone).

After all is said and done, though, I think I do like Kristen Stewart. I enjoy her work even though it is all sort of the same, and I find her awkwardness sort of endearing. I just hope she gets over the self-loathing act soon, because in that industry, I'm sure there's always people wlling to do the deprecating for her.

PS: Her new movie, Welcome to the Rileys, looks wonderful. Trailer: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jjK-szKfGFQ&feature=fvst

Book Clubs!

I am dying to join a book club! Me and my friend Jenna were promising we were going to start one at school this year, but...that definitely didn't happen! Nerd Alert: I really just adore reading books and talking about them. I don't know why the idea of reading a book a month with a bunch of other people all together sounds so appealing to me, but it does! And we can meet and eat snacks and discuss our thoughts...sigh. Such bliss!

Anyway, you'd think on my frickin huge campus I'd be able to find a book club, but I don't even know where to look. Once I went with my friend Elle (actually my "big sis" in the sorority) to her "big bro's" book club (I know I know) and it was cool, except for the fact that most of it was spent discussing what to actually read one day and no one ending up actually deciding on anything...but oh well! This big gay guy wanted to read and discuss each month's issue of Cosmo, which didn't sound like a bad idea to me, but for some reason no one else wanted to! Also there was a super...suuuuper cute Men's Glee Club member there, so it wasn't a huge loss...but I ended up only going once.

Anyways, I found one that looks pretty promising....

http://http//www.elliottbaybook.com/node/clubs

so maybe I will fulfill my dream of joining a real live book club this year!